As I sit here on my couch looking over at Diesel, my teeny dachshund, sleeping upon a living room chair, it occurs to me that people should be more like animals. When Diesel is lonely, he finds a lap to sit in. He never worries about rejection. He never worries about how people will interpret his loneliness. The puppy never wonders if we love him, or why we love him, or if someday we’ll come to our senses and snap out of it. He just accepts the love that is being shown to him, and saves worrying for a day that will never come. Yes, I wish I were more like that.
When I am lonely, I spend long periods of time wondering what it means. If I should worry about being too dependent, which invariably leads to me worrying about whether or not I am too independent… The one thing in life that is infinite is the number of things you can worry about. I aspire to canine contentment.
I want to be able to enjoy what is without wondering about the future or fretting over the past. I want to be able to post here without wondering what people will think of me or what people will say. So… I’m starting now. I’m going to post what I want, forgetting about every other person’s opinion. Mine is the only opinion I truly know, so… It is the only one that counts.
How do you respond to the expectations of others? Any pointers for me?